Whenever you are dealing with chemicals, you had better be paying attention. You think Popeye has that squint because of spinach? Uh --uh Bucko, it's that varnish he's using! Nobody knows what caused his genetically estranged forearms tho.......(Uut, tut tut tut tut!)

Eye protection is a given. But, so many folks forget about the LUNGS! Well, I will mention it once here. Protect those suckers! Smoking is goofy enough, but catalyzed products are really strange. 

There is nothing like the kids at Christmas saying "Do it again Dad!", when you cough up a loogie the size of a small jap import, representing the last paint job you did, and it lands on the tree like some nativity scene and it sparkles to boot! If you do it for a living, or even for a bunch of friends, please invest in a fresh air system, or at LEAST a decent respirator. Is a few hunert bucks to much to pay for the rest of your weasely life? Knowing how to use the tools you buy is also a plus. "Tim the tool man Taylor" is NOT the show or the man to pay homage too at this point.

Whoever said that 90 % of the paint job is the preparation, is a foul mouth S.O.B that deserves to have his ass handed to him, carved in various ways, served on a lazy susan *as* his birthday dinner with a onion wedged up the orifice of your choosing! It is 97 percent if not more!

Look, any body can pull the trigger of a spray gun. But it is a PAINTER that knows what to do when things go goofy, or better yet, how to prevent the problems in the first place. A great painter never has problems. Period. I happen to be a pretty decent painter. Sometimes I get goofy, and slack on the basics. However, I feel competent enough to teach, and sober enough to give CORRECT answers to any questions you feel like putting my way.

So, without further ado, lets have a look at ....

I ain't gonna get into body work here. 

You had better know how to get that done or, do it your selves by now eh?** 

Why paint crumpled tin I say. 

First! The part you are about to paint (or even do work on) MUST BE CLEAN! The best way to prep before paint is to use a wax and grease remover. Actually, this should be the first thing you should use before doing any work on a project.

(I am going to assume all that are reading this web sight can read instructions plainly printed on the cans of stuff they buy!) 

We are also going to assume that the object you are about to paint is a piece of metal/plastic or whatever, and it is in good shape and ready for.............color! 

When deciding on what you want to do as the paint job, color, paint scheme, etc., you first must know by now if what you are painting is ready to except the paint...right? Right. If you have a new piece of factory tin with a stable paint job on it already, it will most likely take hold of a new paint job, and it will last many, many years. 

But, if the paint job you are planning to do is a custom....like a Candy or multi color extravaganza with clear and decals, you had better consider stripping it first! High levels of paint build do not a long a lasting job make. So, if the OEM paint is ok, and all we want to do is apply a simple re-coat of color, we need to first use a Wax 'n grease remover, then wet sand thoroughly with 400/600 grit paper. A cap full of Ivory dish washing liquid in a gallon of water really helps to prevent the paper from clogging and it helps remove more contaminants. If you are doing many colors, or candy’s, or the tank has a lot of paint on it, it should be stripped.

So, if needed we must ....

This is so easy. It is also so messy. Basically you buy the stripper, you slosh it on, you wait, you scrape off the crap...

Voila! 

Done! 

Right? 

WRONG! 

If it were that easy, any body could do it. 

Let's assume you HATE the paint that is on it, and you know you have to yank it off to repaint. OK. "What now Uncle Panny?" you ask. Simple my little love muffins. After we assume yet again that the tin is sound, pressure tested,(in the case of a gas tank) and ready otherwise, we cover those openings with DUCT TAPE. We drape paper, Glad bags, the ex-wife's Persian rug on the floor, and THEN slosh on the BEST F*%$# PAINT STRIPPER WE CAN AFFORD, and let it sit.

(Hint: Any good paint stripper works in these two ways; 

1. by the obvious chemical reaction

(To help speed up this process, Gouge the paint surface deeply in a tic tac toe manner to "open up" the surface of the old paint. Use a screw driver, awl, anything pointy and hard, to get to the substrate.) 

You think this stuff smells bad by accident? Hardly! After you scratch the surface, and you apply rather liberally the paint remover, ( notice some removers PLAINLY STATE to apply the remover in ONE direction only...there's a reason for this if applying with a brush!) I really suggest covering the piece with something like a plastic trash bag. This keeps the solvents, and the vapors, very close to the object you are stripping, and makes them work harder. 

Any time we can make the tools or chemicals do the work for us....the better! 

Don't hurry...be happy. 

Put on a coat. .wait a beer. 

Scrape off the shit you think is ugly, and put on a second coat. 

Have another beer. 

Before you know it, you're drunk and the paint is all gone! 

After all the paint you can remove is gone by chemical, then we must either by hand (eww) or DA sand off ANY and ALL traces of paint and filler that the stripper didn't remove. If one tiny spec is left on, you're really going to regret it. I prefer 80 grit on the ol' air sander. If there are dents and bodywork to do, attack those areas with no finer than a 24 grit grinder. As to the use of a DA sander, I prefer the ones that have a "lock-up" feature that allows you to use it as a "grinder" …sorta. With 80 grit "3-M Green Corp." DA paper, in a locked mode on the ol DA, this really removes everything in a blissful hurry! You must use it right though! Long straight sweeps with much overlap, using moderately forceful pressure to keep the DA spinning fast and, not to much to cause excessive heat on the surface.

After most of the paint is deleted from the object by any kind of stripper, and you sand , grind away all the rest (paint, bondo, whatever) you should then Neutralize it with water first. (remember those instructions on the can?) Then, we should scrub down with a scotch-brite pad, and lacquer thinner, (NEVER use steel wool which contains a lot of oil) and remove all traces of shmutz and residues. (I hope it's now not to late to mention that you should stop eating Kentucky fried chicken, Taco Bell, or ANY OTHER greasy kinda food) next you should follow with a good wax and grease remover like Sikkens, or what ever you like best. 

Do NOT allow yourself or you friends to touch it now! Even the natural oils from your skin can cause big problems later! 

You should now have a PERFECTLY clean shiny piece of metal. This is good! 

Now is the time to do body work if needed. Repeat the wax and grease remover process EVERY TIME you complete a step!

Get it primed as soon as you can! Bare metal does not like the atmosphere. Mother Nature is indeed a fickle wench when it comes to bare, shiny, metallic things.

This is good painting practice. Anybody that tells you otherwise, should be kicked in the groin....Hard!

This causes a lot of confusion, and I don't see why. 

A primer is a coating that is designed to adhere like a bandit to the substrate. This is also a product that does NOT GET SANDED! It is used to adhere to the object in question so that the next product can go on top.(like a primer /surfacer) If you have aluminum, you need a primer that is designed for aluminum and the following coats of whatever. If it is plastic, then the same thing applies. This is why I like PPG's DP-40(and the various other numbers ) from PPG/Ditzler. It works on ALL substrates, and can be top coated with most anything. It is a catalyzed product...(very deadly when introduced to your lungs, or when mixed with anything and ice). 

Next is a PRIMER /SURFACER! This is the shit you sand! 

Some primer/surfacers can go over most anything also, providing you treat the substrate first with more chemicals, like an acid wash. 

So, first we prime, then we place on a primer/surfacer. 

The reason for the surfacer is so that we can fill in imperfections and eventually have a surface that is smooth as a 6 year old girls butt....or so I hear. 

This is where the work comes in...and the talent ...and your patience. Above all else, patience! 

Priming with the surfacer, allowing for proper dry/cure time, block sanding, repriming, etc. etc. etc., until it is PERFECT, is indeed the key! 

So.... first we prime, 

then we primer/surface, 
THEN, we primer/ SEAL! 

This is the last step before actually dipping it into the bucket of paint. 

What I like to do is this: After I get the "fill" primer/surfacer on (the first coats of it) I like to block sand with 220 wet and dry. This is a course sandpaper, but the idea is that we want to knock down and *level* the surface. 

If I sand to much in an area and go through to the fill primer and see the first primer or the steel underneath, I stop sanding there. You should too. Apply more fill primer and do it again. If you are satisfied that it is all perfectly straight and you do see tiny little areas (like an edge here or there) don't panic. This is where the final coat should be sanded with maybe 400/and finer grit papers. Then apply the primer sealer. DP-40 fills in 360 sanding scratches very well.

The sanding is the fun, joy, talent and hard part. 

This is where you will need stamina and plenty of liquids. 

This is where you will see the final product..or how it comes out. 

If you do well here, you will have a great final result. If you don't, you will know what I mean by the saying, "Trying to make Ice cream out of shit". 

When Working with "nekid" metal I think that there is nothing better than 80 Grit paper. 

Again, I really think that this sorta thing must be one with air powered tools. Nothing beats the efficiency of these. This is why all Body Shop people use them. 

I prefer the type that can "lock" as opposed to the type that can just buzz around. 

The key to GOOD sanding is to be able to whack down the surface in a hurry without excessive heat build up. Heat is NOT our friend...yet.

Quick cutting ("the whack") levels the surface in a hurry. This is what we want. On metal, we want to rid the surface of the stuff we don't want with out heat build-up. Otherwise we will warp the tin, destroy the tool and waste the sand paper! 

For a piece of metal that needs NO body work, 80 grit is wonderful. For those areas that "need" body work and the fillers used, these areas will NEED no less than a 24 grit "bite". I like 16 for the mud areas. When sanding and finishing the plastic filler..(Bondo™) it should be done with care. There should be a nice surrounding area BEYOND the filler with 16/24 grit. The filler should be shaped with a "cheese grater" and sorta final shaped with 24 grit using a block or whatever. The shape must be right. After the shape of the filler is done right, I like to use a polyester "Glazing" puttys, and finish with...80 Grit!. This is when I use and apply the primers, and the primer surfacers. When I am ready to sand the primer surfacer, I use 180 or 220 wet/dry to level the surface.

I also use a "guide coat".

When the Primer surfacer is applied, I lightly spray a mist coat of contrasting color over the surfacer. This "guide coat" seeps into the sand scratches and low parts of the object, and allows you to see very clearly any woopies or dents, or deep scratches. You should use this method if you have poor eyesight....or if you are lazy.

When wet sanding, I always add a few drops of good ol IVORY (or whatever) dishwashing liquid soap. One, this helps keep the paper from glogging and two, it also rids the surface of those nasty oils and goo. 

Once I have the final prime sanded with 400 grit, I can apply a sealer...and then paint!

After the paint is all done, I like to sand it again! (I am a glutton for punishment) But, I now use 1000 grit..WET! With soap. I wait a day or two and sand it down to a PERFECT satin finish. Be aware that the water must be HYPER clean!

One piece of grit in it can ruin your day! After the sanding with 1K , I go back over it with 1200 to 1500 grit. This is when I do the polishing.

Lots of primer surfacers on the market have what they call a "case hardening" date. Usually, this is just for those yucky lacquer based primer/surfacers. After a week or so "they" don't like to accept top coats. The reason being, they get too hard on the surface which doesn't allow good chemical bonding with the next things that get dumped on top. 

This is why one should not put off too long, work as quickly as possible, and use the best materials...like me. 

After you are satisfied with the results of bodywork and finish priming, you should use that last "primer/sealer" no longer then 12 hours before you are going to actually paint. This still allows you to lightly "nib" the surface of bug parts, cracker crumbs, dirt, dust , what have you. 

Remember...use WAX 'N GREASE REMOVER in between all steps! 

When you have everything ready and sealed, dust tacked off, it is now time to get your paint mixed! When masking the parts, it is very important to use the best tape you can. 3-M's automotive grade is the only choice for me. It should be the only choice for you also. The cheap stuff found at Safeway or the local Joes hardware store will not stick well...until it gets either wet or gets paint on it.....Then you can't get the crap off! For two tone overlays, again use the 3-M plastic "Fine-Line" tape to separate the colors. Works great. It leaves a wonderful crisp, fine edge that a paper based tape can’t.

Yes, I prefer products made by PPG.

Deltron, while expensive, is great to use by beginners and, professionals alike. It drys VERY fast and gives the best Gosh darn results. They make many other types too, but I ain't gonna get into it here**. 

If you don't have a compressor, stop now. (I ain't even gonna ask how you put the primer on) Spray guns! Wow. Personal choice!

However, it MUST BE very clean and maintained. 

Never painted before? Practice on the trashcans, mailbox, the neighbor's car, whatever. Just remember to be deliberate, but careful. 

Don't rush, allow dry time between those coats. 

Do NOT try to do a Candy color your first time out! 

That involves a few pages all to itself. 

Black is really the easiest color to shoot (also the hardest to prep for 'though) and white, to me, is the toughest to shoot. 

What we want is coverage plus extra to play around with. 

We don't want a thousand coats of paint. Why? It'll never dry, we also don't want too few. 

We do want adhesion and longevity. Three coats is perfect. 

I normally apply 4 to 5….Why? Because I wait for the paint to dry a day or two, then I wet/sand with 1000 grit and buff to a luster that will make you blind.….leaving three coats! 

It should also be warm where you are doing it. Anything colder than 65 degrees, and you're going to have a very pretty floor. Because that's where the paint will run to. It also will not cure right.

When putting on the first coats of paint, be aware that if anything is going to go wrong, it will most likely happen on the first coat! This is why the FIRST coat should be a very light but even coat of paint. If things like "Fisheyes" or "lifting" appear now, then pack it up. You did something VERY wrong. But, don’t panic….it’s still savable….we hope.

They make so many products that add to the brilliance of paint and the care thereof, as to make your head spin. Kinda like NetscapeÓplugins. Some of them suck, (like NetscapeÓplugins), but most just need to be known they either exist, or be taught how to use them. And I will mention them as this page grows, or as questions arise.

I have ALL the answers. 

Sorta

If you laid on the paint and you are not to satisfied with the gloss due to things like "Orange Peel" or maybe the spittle from your mouth got on it because you were drooling on it because you pulled off a KILLER JOB, or maybe even some dust specks here and there….DON"T WORRY! If the color or final coats are OK, then maybe it just needs a wee tad of "rubbing out". This too is easy…but.. it takes practice. That’s why I always say to put on a few extra coats of paint so you can "play". 

This is dangerous for all those that have never wanted to get there nails dirty, or have never operated a power tool before. Only through experience can one truly know how much paint one has to "play with". 

Basically, One coat of paint can achieve .5 (or more) mils of paint. (a .mil is basically the thickness of a piece of decent paper) This of course depends on your spray gun, and the paint, and many other factors. If one uses "shake an shoots" (Spray cans) you will NEVER achieve any decent film build , let alone a film build made worth a hoot. But anyway.... One has to be able to use 1000 grit (or finer) wet and dry sandpaper (with a wee tad of Ivory to prevent clogging) and achieve a PERFECTLY SMOOTH satin finish. (WARNING! DON’T SAND NEAR or on THE EDGES!!!!…..The buffing will take care of those all by its self!!)

Then, we must be able to use a rather good rubbing compound (I suggest PPG DXR- 65) to achieve the first initial gloss, using a 9" wheel on a SOIX buffer, or equivalent.

Do NOT try to do stuff with a Black-n-Decker-pecker-wrecker on a drill . . . I will warn you only once . . .machine speed must be around 1100 or less RPM. 

Anything faster will BURN the paint in the hands of the inexperienced muffin head….this is bad. 

We also need to know about the different "pads" used to rub out things.

(I told you this shit gets involved!)

Usually white and very much like the real sheep. Fluffy and thick.

The next type is a lambs wool pad, (usually yellow and very fine) used to apply compounds like "Perfect-it-II" (or other microfine products) used to whack away (or fill) heavy swirl marks, and obliterate fine scritchy scratches. "Liquid Ebony" is also a nice product, but does nothing but FILL, and does not eliminate any problems.

Are you with me so far? 

Ok.

The use of these products is essential for any classy looking job. It is the polishing that separates the men from the boys. Think about it: Lacquer, while very beautiful, dries flat. It is the RUBBING that gives it its final glory…a glory that doesn’t last anyway…but it sure looks bitchen! A urethane will have the exact same results if given the same love, plus last longer then you do and, be extremely chemical resistant to boot!

Fisheyes are a "thing that happens" when a painter is painting, and the paint "coagulates" in spots. This only happens when poor preparation is evident, or someone is using a silicone based wax (or ARMORALL) within a 100 mile radius. 

Greasy fingered idjuts touching the product to be painted also cause this. 

To eliminate "fisheyes", is to not have the cause of them around in the first place - duh! 

But as we all know, "shit happens".

What do you do? 

Easy. 

There are products that you can add to the paint, to "help" eliminate the problem from spreading further. Yes, these are called "fish eye eliminators". There is indeed a product called "SmoothyÓand SmoothyIIÓ". These are f*cked! Buy the "Eliminator" for the paint you are using.....(IMHO, the only decent fish-eye, degradent for use in ALL paints is the one made by PPG)

Unfortunately, adding any kind of fish eye remover to the paint also causes orange peel. It's a give and kinda take thing. This is why I stress proper cleaning so you don't have to add this crap to begin with. Those that use shake'n'shoot -spray cans, do NOT have this option.

In the event of a major Tuna-eye attack, the best thing to do is to put the gun down! Let the surface dry, and sand it out smooth. 

Then, reapply the color or clear with the smallest amount of "eliminator" as possible to get the job done. 

Do you see "fisheye" starting?

If so, the best thing to do is to apply "piss coats" one at a time. Light mist coats to seal. Then apply heavier, as you can.

If you get runs in the paint , it means one of two things. 

1) You lack experience...you're doing too much...too soon!

2) It's way to friggen' cold, which means you lack the knowledge . . . (see #1)

1) Don't be squirtin' in Temps less then 70 degrees! 

2) Consider one coat at a time, and do not try to finish the "job" in ten minutes.

3) You can read. You are supposed to know what temperature grade thinner to use at the moment. This is why all manufactures make several types of reducers and thinners to make your painting job a breeze ,and get the desired results.

There is no reason for lack of adhesion of the paint - unless you were lazy in the prep and sanding tech-neeks!

Here is a great run down for the perfect job! First we consider we have a piece of metal (or whatever) to paint. I will consider it is good ol American Steel, stripped of all old paint and debris....an NO BODY WORK needed!

1) The piece of steel in question will be cleaned, washed, and "finished" with nothing less then 80 grit paper. Wax and grease remover usage is a given.

2) The correct primer will be used, followed by primer surfacers. Final sanding should and WILL be done according to common sense and labels put forth on the top coat instructions. Final sanding of the primer surfacer will be done with NO LESS then the grit of 400...preferably 600.....wet and dry.

3) The proper sealer will be used, and the color coat will be applied correctly. 

3.5) Clears (if needed) will also be applied in the SAME FASHION...correctly.

4) Proper dry times and TEMPERATURE WILL be understood and absorbed in your brain, so that you can do whatever else needs to be done...like buffing-polishing etc..

5) you will abide by all rules of hyper-cleanliness so that you do NOT have to add foolish additives to paint to counter act your mistakes later on! 

I like it when potential customers bombard me with questions. I feel that I can answer them in a way that satisfies them several ways.

1. with the info they need, and

2. with a wee tad of dry humor intermixed to keep them happy and informed. I never lie, and I feel I can give them the answers they need so they can be assured that they will get the best job they can get for the hard earned money they are going to put out for a paint job....even if its NOT me that is going to be doing it. 

Also, things like gas tank leaks will just make me laugh and hang up the phone.

** besides, it is to involved to show or describe here